Mommy Issues
Posted on August 28, 2025
Greetings and salutations!
I know I might sound like a fucking teenager when I say this, but sometimes my mum pisses me off.
Like, not even in a "oh, she’s just being protective" way — no, in a "why the fuck are you saying this to me right now?" way.
She’ll hit me with some shitty comment that’s so unnecessary it makes me wonder if she’s actually trying to pick a fight. And the worst part is, she’ll act completely normal two minutes later, like I’m the one being dramatic for still being upset. It makes me feel insane, like I can’t even trust my own reaction.
It might have something to do with the fact that we still live together, in a shared household (kind of), at my ripe age of 25. But hey, they are living with me, not the other way around!
Some days, I feel like she wants to pick random fights with me. As if she was testing how far she can push me before I snap at her (and therefore become the bad guy). Her mother used to do the same, and so did her father (my "grandparents"). I would love to give her the benefit of the doubt and believe that she's not like that, that she means well. But does she really?
My mother's father used to take pleasure in making other feel terrible. As my husband promptly suggested, that is not a sign of just angry issues but of something worse. Of something called Antisocial personality disorder — aka being a fucking sociopath.
I must say, it was a shock thinking of a close family member in that light, but hell... I'd be lying if I said it did not make sense. It does make sense and that is scary. What is even scarier is the fact that my mom's mother was probably suffering from Narcissistic personality disorder — well, to be honest, she wasn't the one suffering. Everyone else was, though. And I mean everyone — her family members, friends, coworkers, people who came into contact with her on absolute accident.
And yet, every single thing that is wrong with me was always "my father's fault". My ADHD, anxiety and depression, "mouthing off" and "acting out", innability to stay skinny, and everything else that was ever an issue with me. It has always been "my father's fault". His genes were defective, he gave me all the negative characteristics, it was his fault I am how I am. Even if my cousins from my mom's side have the exact same issues.
What can I say? Family is a wonderful thing, but sometimes I do wish I was able to pick my family members (even if I technically did choose my own step-dad).
And now, to quote M*A*S*H: Goodbye, Farewell and Amen